A Message for the Straight People

Someone telling another person that they are not gay does not make them any less gay. Nobody likes to be called something they’re not.  So clearly, gay people don’t like when straight people tell them no, in fact, they are straight.

Sometimes straight people tell gay people they are straight, because they feel like they are helping them .  For that reason, I want to explain something. This way in the future those concerned, well-meaning people don’t try to help someone in such an offensive way.

Just like in everything else, sexuality is not black and white. For a lot of people sexuality  is a whole lot more grey and fluid. Trying to fit everyone into categories of gay, straight or bi is only as clear as calling all people black, white or asian. It just does not work. There are so many other types of people out there. Even though it would probably be easier to call everyone  black, white or asian it would be completely inaccurate. It is just as inaccurate to call everyone gay, straight or bi.

Humans change over time and the same goes for attractions and relationships.  Some people (like me) are attracted to people NOT gender.  A pansexual is someone who has the potential for attraction to people of all gender identities and sexual orientations. For a pansexual, gender and sex are insignificant in determining whether or not they will be attracted to someone.

The Kinsey Scale can help make the topic of sexuality more clear. Alfred Kinsey was one of the first scientists to conduct large-scale scientific tests into human sexuality and he came up with something called the Kinsey Scale. The Kinsey Scale rages from 0, meaning exclusively heterosexual, to 6, meaning exclusively homosexual and it looks something like this:

0- Exclusively heterosexual with no homosexual

1- Predominantly heterosexual, only incidentally homosexual

2- Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual

3- Equally heterosexual and homosexual

4- Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual

5- Predominantly homosexual, only incidentally heterosexual

6- Exclusively homosexual

They found that sexual behavior, thoughts and feelings towards the same or opposite sex was not always equal across time. Though most men and women reported being exclusively heterosexual, and a percentage reported exclusively homosexual, many individuals disclosed behaviors or thoughts somewhere in between. People

The Kinsey Scale doesn’t do justice to all the possibilities of people’s sexuality but it at least gives a little bit clearer understanding that there is at least more than three. People can be anywhere on the spectrum or on a completely separate spectrum of their own. My tiny description of sexuality does not even touch on transgender people and all the other ways people are.

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